Funny

Woody · Funny

FRANKFURT (Reuters) - Police in the German city of Aachen received an unusual call for help late on Wednesday when a woman telephoned to complain her husband was not fulfilling his sexual obligations.

After the couple had been sleeping in separate beds for several months without intimate contact, the 44-year-old woman woke the husband, 45, in the middle of the night and demanded he satisfy her needs, police spokesman Paul Kemen said on Thursday.

When her advances were refused, a row broke out and she called the police and asked them to intervene, he added.

"The police officials did not feel able to resolve the dispute, let alone issue any kind of official order," Kemen said.

"And because no crime or infringement could be identified, all they could do was file a report in case intervention might be required at a later date," he added.

Strange I would have thought they would have been straight round there , I know i would.

Bravo

I once spent a night in Killingbeck nick cos of a similar situation...

I was watching the kids while my ex went out. She came home at like 2:30am reeking of stale beer and vomit. She got next to me in bed and she was absolutely freezing, she grabbed hold of my you know what and slurred into my ear with vomituous breath, 'Do me now big boy' (or something along those lines.

I proceeded to tell her to go do one, upon which she did as I asked, and truly went on one. She was gonna jump out of the window with our son, who was like 18 months old at the time, the psycho bitch. She tried to claw my face apart, I restrained her (I have never hit a bird in my life, apart from my sister when I was like 11). Somehow in the scuffle, she caught her earring on something and her ear got cut.

Later, she phoned the police saying I had assaulted her. The fine 'thick-as-pigshit' officers came.

They saw me in an obviously totally sober state and her pissed as a fart. Me covered in scratches etc, and her only injury a slight cut from her earring, and they said to me that I'd have to leave as the house was in her name. I said I can't go anywhere at this time of the night (was something like 4am by this time). So they said the only alternative was for me to spend the night in a cell, so I had to do that. They left a drunk person in charge of two kids, which I thought was against the law for one thing.

Bloody uncomfortable night that was. Just cos I didn't fancy stale vomit down my throat...

Woody

What a cracking story is your new wife any better???

Bravo

Woody

awwwwwwwr , get me one please

Armleywhite

tornadoSam